I had a hard time finding recent pics of me NOT taken on my iPhone. I’ll have to make it a point to do a Project 12 post with my whole body soon!

This blog is about fitness. and nutrition. and body image. and motherhood. and womanhood. and being the best YOU.  I copied the following from my About Page and added emphasis for this post.

Tori wants….

• to inspire you to take control of the things in your life you want to change and…change them!
• to empower you with the knowledge you need to be successful at achieving your goals!
• you to feel confident in your body, that it will stand the test of time and will give you the physical strength to live the life you imagined!
• you to feel the freedom to get dressed without tears and anger and go out into the world happy with your body, regardless of what the scale says.
• you to be proud of yourself and how hard you work every day and go easy on yourself when you slip up. We are human.  We are not perfect.
• you to stop comparing yourself to other women and compare yourself to you.

I want you to BE WHO YOU ADMIRE!!!

I meant every word of that. I wish that for every woman.

All my life, I’ve been obsessed with my body…sometimes to the extreme with eating disorders. I talked about eating disorders…

• in an interview here and
• regarding Portia de Rossi’s book here  and
• posing the question about bodybuilding and an eating disorder link here and
• in my post about my Figure Lessons here.

So, all my life, being obsessed about my body, I have wondered and worried about my body and pregnancy.  Would I feel free during pregnancy from feeling fat? Would my body ever be the same?  People ask me all the time, as if it’s ironic, how I went from the best shape of my life last year to the heaviest I’ve ever been (having FITbaby) this year.  Well, that was the plan! That was my master plan. And, it worked out beautifully…at least I think so!

During the competition preparation, I realized what’s important. And, it’s not my figure. It’s not!! It’s more important to feel good than look good. It’s no fun to be obsessed with my body. It’s no fun to do hours of cardio a day at the expense of other things I love. It’s no fun to be hungry ALL the time. It was a great lesson. It was a great experience. But, honestly, had I waited until after I had FITbaby, I would have quit. Not because I think quitting is okay, but because I think that contest prep would have set a poor example for her…at 3 months old, at 2 years old, at 10 years old or at 15 years old.  And, I would not have sacrificed her for that experience, or to look good.

During pregnancy I discovered more about myself. I did not like feeling like I was unable to move. That is why I like to be lean, and mean, and fit. I like to move and be active and enjoy life! And, having a belly slows me down! I also discovered I felt beautiful during pregnancy. I didn’t feel fat. I didn’t feel self-conscious about my body changing [except I hated the attention...so much attention for being pregnant! I much prefer now, where my FITbaby gets all of the attention!]  My body was that way simply because I was growing a BABY! What a gift!

Did I struggle with body image during pregnancy at all? The only time that I found “hard” was before I started to show. I couldn’t fit in my pre-baby clothes. And, I wasn’t ready for maternity clothes. I had to go buy clothes one size bigger. That was no fun. But, it was short-lived!  Then, I started to show and I felt uncomfortable. Not with the way I looked but with the way I felt….it was hard to move around!

I wrote a few posts during pregnancy about body image and I got a few responses…both in public and private messages…you can read many of them….

• Why I don’t love pregnancy
• Why I love pregnancy
• Thoughts on Pregnancy
• Body Image During Pregnancy

The point of this post?  I’ve never felt better about my body in my entire life than I did the few months after pregnancy…  Yep, you read that right. NEVER. FELT. BETTER.  I have never been more confident. I have never cared so little how I looked. My body image…doesn’t freakin’ matter. Who cares!  FREEDOM!!!! My priorities had shifted. For the first time in my life, there was something WAY more important than the way I looked. Did FITbaby care how I looked?  Nope! Did FIThubby care how I looked? Nope!  My amazing body birthed this 9.5 pound baby somewhat easily! Amazing! How could I punish this amazing body? How could I ask it for more than it was already giving? For once, I had more important things to do…take care of my body for my baby!

The first few months with FITbaby were ROUGH.  I wrote this a few months ago….and I can’t change a word to make it apply now….

My little FITbaby keeps me too busy to care how skinny  my waist looks today. My FITbaby has me in awe of her beauty and I don’t care about my own. When I look at myself through her eyes, I am the best. I am beautiful. She doesn’t care if I’m a size 6 or 8.  She cares that I take the time for her. That I smile at her. That I look her in the eyes. That I am happy. My hubby is supportive of my hard work every day. He loves my new body as much as he loved the old one. I have never felt more comfortable naked. [Yep, I said that!]  This body I have is amazing. It has done so much more than I ever imagined.

This does not allow for an excuse to be overweight and out of shape though!  Still, to be the best mom I need to be the BEST ME. I need to work as hard as I can…at everything…not JUST being a mom. I need to be an athlete.  I need to be healthy. I need to be smart. I need her to see and learn from all of it.

Just a few months post-pregnancy I lost all the pregnancy weight. But, that was still 5-10 pounds heavier than I “wanted” to be.  [Even though I think pounds are a joke...it can still be a start to measure where you are!]   Now, 7 months after having FITbaby, I’m just a couple pounds from my goal weight but again, that’s a joke! I have lost a lot of muscle b/c  I have not kept up my heavy lifting workouts!  I have not kept up my strength! Not to worry…it all comes back. Muscle memory is real. I am not worried. I will get it back. I will be strong again…stronger even than I was a couple years back!

Share with me!!!

How did you feel immediately post pregnancy? Was it hard? Did you feel FREE like I did?

And, stay tuned….I have a post coming on the images we have in our home and how they affect our girls.  I’ve done some analyzing of the images I have posted in my gym and inspiration boards.

I found this when looking through old drafts for a post! I wrote this on January 9 and never posted it!!!  The only problem is that I lost the youtube videos. So here it is….

This was on the news this morning [January 9, 2010].  She’s former Miss Universe in 2004, Jennifer Hawkins.  Reportedly the airbrushing would have retouched the “crease” (not a roll) on her waist and a “dimple” on her thigh (which I cannot find).  She obviously has to work extremely hard to stay in great shape and it’s nice to see how she actually looks!  She looks perfect to me, even unairbrushed.  Just my opinion.  She doesn’t need airbrushing and I’m glad she didn’t have any.

Personally, whenever I see a woman that I think looks amazing and then I see that she looks “chubby” [in our American terms] when she turns or bends a certain way, JUST LIKE ME, I feel better.  I realize that the ideal that I have been looking for since I turned 14, the ideal body fat % that I’ve been dieting to maintain forever will still have me looking a bit chubby at this angle or that bend or whatever….because we are human and we will not look like the models in the magazines…ever…because they don’t!  I feel more normal when I see how “she” [one of my body-role-models] looks unretouched.  “She” isn’t perfect and nor will I be…ever…ah! The key to happiness. I’m not perfect and never will I be!

Can you believe she is getting criticism for this cover?!  Well, ok it’s not that surprising…. She looks AMAZING!!  She’s in great shape. She’s beautiful. She’s a model. Women hate her! Why, ladies, do we hate her? Stop it!  Women everywhere are saying that she is tall, skinny, and in great shape so she doesn’t represent most of America…why not??!!  WHY NOT??!!

That is a whole different issue to me….the hatred of women in great shape! Why can’t we embrace women who have figured out what are trying to figure out – how to get and stay in shape – and work with them to be like them?  Why can’t we learn from each other? Grow with each other? Encourage each other?

Why do we have to hate women who have it figured out? Why do we have to hate women with better genes than us who can eat whatever they want and never gain an ounce?  Why hate women who are suffering with eating disorders and hating themselves every day?  Help them!  We’re women and we need to stick together and work together and embrace each others’ strengths and weaknesses. We need to learn from each other and surround ourselves with women who make us better!!!

Model Jennifer Hawkins spoke of supporting her charity of choice The Butterfly Foundation and I had the youtube video but it’s off msnbc.com now so…..if you want more info you can check out the link.  The Butterfly Foundation provides support for Australians who suffer from eating disorders and negative body image issues and their carers.

A similar conversation was started when Jamie Lee Curtis posed in More Magazine in 2002.  It was her idea to do a photoshoot without airbrushing those photos.  Prior to this photoshoot she had been in many movies showing her fit figure.  So, seeing her in this way was nice for many women.

Another, more recent model who hit the news was plus sized model, Lizzie Miller, in the Fall of 2009 regarding unretouched photos of herself in Glamour Magazine.  And, even she says she cringed a bit when she first saw it.  But, women everywhere have been talking about this ever since. It made women feel better about themselves rather than worse!

I have mixed feelings about this. In general, you all know how I feel about accepting and loving yourself and your body. You also know how I feel about health and that includes weight. There is a healthy weight everyone should be BUT you can be that healthy weight and be unhealthy.  You cannot say that everyone who is x size is healthy or unhealthy…it’s just not that simple!

I have always been concerned about women in the public who proclaim they are healthy when they are clearly obese….Obviously this does not pertain to Lizzie Miller [photo to the right] but that’s always bothered me. I feel like we should love our bodies in whatever stage they are. I feel like we should accept why we are there, whether it is our fault, meds, disease, pregnancy, etc. It’s not ok to blame but accept and embrace where we are at that moment. BUT, to say someone is healthy when they are not has always bothered me.  There is a particular waist size and body fat percentage that puts people at risk for tons of diseases and is simply unhealthy.

What do you think?  Am I being unreasonable?

Do you want to see more “normal” and unairbrushed images in magazines?

]]> http://fitoriblog.com/unairbrushed-photos-of-models/feed/ 10 http://fitoriblog.com/eating-disorders-how-close-is-the-line-with-dieters/?utm_source=rss&utm_medium=rss&utm_campaign=eating-disorders-how-close-is-the-line-with-dieters http://fitoriblog.com/eating-disorders-how-close-is-the-line-with-dieters/#comments Tue, 02 Nov 2010 22:16:47 +0000 tori http://fitoriblog.com/?p=2628 image source As you know, eating disorders is a topic that is near and dear to my heart. I have said before that the bodybuilding world is very close to or is in some way intertwined with eating disorders. And, I have often wondered where the line is with many of us who seem obsessed with our bodies, even if it doesn’t reach the definition of an eating disorder. The definition of anorexia nervosa actually includes the weight of the individual yet it is a psychological disorder. I am glad that the many definitions and categories of eating disorders are growing!  I think EDs come in many shapes and sizes of individuals and many different forms of suffering. I read many healthy living blogs and [...]]]>

image source

As you know, eating disorders is a topic that is near and dear to my heart. I have said before that the bodybuilding world is very close to or is in some way intertwined with eating disorders. And, I have often wondered where the line is with many of us who seem obsessed with our bodies, even if it doesn’t reach the definition of an eating disorder. The definition of anorexia nervosa actually includes the weight of the individual yet it is a psychological disorder. I am glad that the many definitions and categories of eating disorders are growing!  I think EDs come in many shapes and sizes of individuals and many different forms of suffering.

I read many healthy living blogs and sometimes I will read a post and will think to myself and wonder if that person has crossed the line a little and is in a scary “head-space.”  I’ve been there. I think it’s really easy to go there during a diet…..thinking of dieting, food and body image more than anything else in the day and not being able to separate body image from self image.

Yesterday was a fantastic episode of Oprah with Portia de Rossi and I think her book sounds great!  She did a great job of explaining some of her feelings of inadequacy and insecurity.  Here is part of a transcript from the last couple of minutes of the show….PLEASE READ BELOW and tell me what you think….

[Oprah] You say you wrote it for everybody who’s ever been on a diet.

[Portia] Living with anorexia and bulimia is hell, but chronic dieting is also hell. Living your entire life, never feeling good enough about your body, always feeling like if you weighed a little less somehow you’d be happier…your life would be better…is a horrible way to live.  And, it’s a very short step from a full blown eating disorder, but really the only way I recovered from my eating disorder and from chronic dieting was to never ever restrict any kind of food, not even portion size.  And really it’s the only way that food loses it’s power over you.  If you can have something every day as much as you want, you tend not to want it as much anymore.  And after a period of time you actually eat what your body needs, you eat what makes you happy, and you don’t think about food ever again.

[Oprah] And that is how you healed yourself.

[Portia] And that is how I healed myself.

What she said really struck me. During contest prep I really started hating the diet and hating the obsession over my body. I wanted it to stop. I wanted to be normal again. And it took some time to get there. My body was CRAVING all kinds of foods and had been starved and when you’re starving you can’t control your diet! Food does control you. You. are. starving. You can’t have self control over food when you’re starving. It’s a losing battle.  You’re starving. You “cheat” on your diet. You feel like such a failure.  You start restricting again or just get back on your diet or whatever. Then, you hit a point where you are starving again and your body is craving something and you “break” and you “cheat” again….NOT because you are weak but because you are human and your body has needs that you are not fulfilling.

In these last few months after this competition, I have stabilized my hunger. I have stopped thinking about food all the time…what I can and cannot have. I eat normal portions. I make healthy choices for my health and my future children. I enjoy my food though. We eat whole and real foods but I add sour cream and butter and we have dessert. I do not beat myself up for my food choices. Sometimes I’ll feel full and say or think….probably ate too much…won’t do that again w/ that or there.  So what? Move on? You can adjust your diet around it or you can work out more or you can obsess all day about it or you can just let it go and move on.

I’m now rambling and could ramble all day about this subject, but I had to share that GREAT quote from Portia de Rossi yesterday and some thoughts about this….now share yours?

Any thoughts on what I shared about myself or on that quote from Portia?

Is she downplaying how easy it is to “recover” or “heal” from an ED?  Is her solution too simple?

OR is she exaggerating that dieters all have EDs? What do you think?

sources:  Unbearable Lightness book |  Oprah show with Portia de Rossi |

Wow, have I changed.  Isn’t it amazing to look back sometimes and see how far you’ve come and how much better you are today than you used to be?  I look back over my life and remember all of the years wasted wishing I looked a different way. I obsessed over looking like someone else and most of those years I was trying to look unhealthy!!! I used to want to look like Kate Moss.  Skinny. No muscle. Frail. Soft. High cheekbones. Flat belly. Skinny thighs.

Now, I look at that photo like I would look at a photo of someone unhealthy in the opposite direction. I don’t want anything to do with that body type. I don’t want to be weak, frail and skinny. I want to be strong.

LET THE PENDULUM SWING!!!

Cut to the years before my contest prep.  The years before contest prep I would open the pages of Oxygen Magazine and Muscle and Fitness HERS [read: Monica Brant] and would want to look like those girls!  I decided that I wanted to look strong and maybe even a little intimidating. It was my way of standing out and being tough.  I decided that it was a really tough goal to achieve and that I would achieve that goal one day. One day I would be that muscular and that lean and I’d look like that.

What was I thinking?! Well, I was dilutional to think that anyone really looks like that without:

• devoting their entire life and all of their being to eating, sleeping, breathing “clean” foods and the gym…i.e. eating every 3 hours, never eating out, never socializing over food, 2+ hours of cardio a day, plus lifting, minimal diet and feeling hungry all the time….[ok, I'll stop.]
• working in the industry and giving up everything in order to “look” good [read: shallow?]
• taking “performance enhancing drugs”

Now, don’t get me wrong!  There are MANY, MANY competitors who are completely natural and look amazing! They have busted their butts to look that good….naturally! It can be done, BUT it takes years.  It takes discipline and it takes sacrifices! And for many women they love that lifestyle. I am not one of them. I need more balance and more focus on health and less focus on body image to be happy.

It took me actually doing what it takes to try and look like that to realize WHAT I am happy with as an ideal physique for myself AND what i am NOT willing to sacrifice to look good!

My new ideal body type is in between the two extremes that I once envied. I now want to be muscular and strong but still a little soft. I want to feel good, look good and still be able to function well. I want to feel as strong as I look. I want to be as tough as I look.  A great balance of this physique, for me, is Jessica Biel. And, I think we all need something to work toward to keep us physically active.  I look at her and compare her to the time that I was happiest with my body and realize I’d like to gain more muscle.  That’s a great and healthy goal!

What is your next challenge?

• Fitness competition?
• Marathon or race?
• Labor?
• Losing the baby weight?

Sometimes a physical goal is ok…if it’s kept in perspective!  I will never be obsessed with my body again…I hope. I hated waking up every morning and the first thing I wanted to do was check my abs….or checking my abs every time I went into the bathroom during the day!  YUCK!  I never want to live like that again!

But, even at my leanest, I’d still like to add some muscle to my upper body.  [My lower body is plenty muscular for now!]  I’d love to add some shoulders, back, bis…but I don’t want to be as lean as a Figure Competitor….EVER!  I may change my mind, but I doubt it.  Things do change. I never thought I’d change my opinion from wanting to look like Kate Moss or Monica Brant…but I did!  Life happens. We change. We grow. And, THANK GOD FOR THAT!

This is me at 145 pounds [pic at the right].  I am 154 now…just FYI.   I like this level of body fat for me [at 145]. And, hopefully, after children I will look something like this again, but there will be a new me I am sure and I am excited for that!

There will be new goals and things change!!!

[click on photos for their sources]

What does your ideal body type look like?

Have you evolved what you want to look like?

How have your physical goals changed?

What’s your next physical goal?

I saw something the other day on TV with obese children and it made me think.  Does it benefit our children to let them know if they are predisposed to things, such as heart disease or addiction? Will this allow our children to use it as an excuse?  ”I was going to get it anyway so who cares?”  Will it scare them?  Or will it give them the proper warning and how early is too early to tell them about their genes?!

We know that certain diseases and personality traits run in families but we do not yet know how much is nature vs. nurture or why.  There are some studies that link this to genetics.  And, if you look at my family as an example, you would believe this.

I was taught at a young age to be careful of alcohol because of the alcoholism in my family. I don’t know if this was emphasized enough though!  I plan to emphasize this more with my kids, but will this allow them an excuse to become an alcoholic? or cause them to feel out of control? or will I overemphasize something they don’t need to focus on? or  scare them a little in order to keep them away from certain addictive substances and make them aware? I just don’t know.

I am scared of alcohol. I don’t drink it.  Very rarely will you see me drink.  There are too many alcoholics in my family.  I am scared of prescription drugs too.  I know my family history and it scares me.  I am also very aware of my moods and depression. Again, I am super-aware.  I am super-aware that there is hoarding in my family and I try really hard to be sure I show no signs of this!  I am aware of obesity and heart disease that will be a part of my children’s genes.  So, will warning them scare them?  or allow an excuse? or is it the information they need?  Will they “get” it?

I learned a lot during my contest prep over the last year.  You can read about  it here in my Figure Lessons post.  One of the things I learned is that I don’t just love food. Yes, I do love food. I love beautiful presentations and combinations of it. But, I am also a food addict…a sugar addict really.  I think many of us are…more than may know or admit it.  I didn’t know this until the last year.  It’s easy to eat enough sugar to get a seratonin release and feel better….for a minute.  It makes me feel better knowing that we are predisposed to like sugar and that it is a drug, so I’m not the only one.  But, I need to treat sugar like a drug and stay away from it like I do prescription drugs and alcohol.  Work in progress….

Once I started paying attention to my sugar-eating and unconscious eating habits, I figured out I’m an anxious eater. If I feel overwhelmed and don’t know where to start on my list of things to do, I’ll find myself in the kitchen eating to fill the time and make myself feel better.  I think it’s good to be aware. I feel better knowing about my weakness and working towards control over it. I’ve learned mostly that some people can control themselves around sugar cookies and I am not one of them SO I do not have them in the house. I don’t think I’ve had a sugar cookie in 1.5 years!  I can’t have just one so I don’t have one.

I don’t know if we all have addictions or not.  It seems like there are some people who don’t appear to have a problem being addicted to anything, but are they just better at hiding it than others?  I don’t know. I do know that everyone has things they struggle with and I think many people struggle with different addictions and obsessions.  I also know that I was aware of staying away from alcohol yet the “addiction” in my family is still a part of me…I just choose food and have to work on that every day of my life. Can I help my kids from struggling from this also?   What do you think?

My skinny jeans that became huge in the waist during contest prep this year

I have spoken before about my history with feeling out of control and struggling with an eating disorder.  I talked about it in my interview with Kelly Olexa. I overcame that by learning how to eat and exercise for health, fuel my body and take care of myself. I learned how to have control over my weight the healthy way!

I am a tall girl so my weight is high.  On stage I was 143 and about 15.5 – 16% body fat.  For my height, I should weight 138 according to BMI and weight charts – they do not account for muscle!  They are wrong! At 138 I’d be around 13% body fat, I believe so great for the Figure Stage but not maintainable or healthy.

Do you weigh yourself every day? It has been said that people who weight themselves often, sometimes daily, have the most success with weight loss.  During contest prep, when trying to lose fat, I weighed myself ever morning. It helped to keep me on track. At night instead of eating ice cream, I would remember that the scale would reflect that ice cream in the morning. Did you know that your weight can be 5 to 10 pounds higher due to water??!!

I haven’t weighed myself like this since the contest though because I can get obsessed with the scale and  let it make or break my day!  I would get on the scale in the morning and if it was a low number I’d be happy!  But, I’d also think in the back of my head that I could eat a little extra…it’s ok.  BAD!  Or, if it was high, it would ruin my day. I’d feel horrible about myself and all of my recent efforts.  Often it was high because I was retaining water.   But, I let that number determine how I would feel about myself that day!  Crazy, right?

After the contest, I started to use my pants as a gage.  After all, we don’t really care how much we weight, right? We just care how lean and fit we are!  And, we know that muscle weights more than fat. We just want to fit into our jeans. We want our waist to get smaller!  Now, when I’m trying to diet or maintain, I’ll try on my “scale” pants. It’s the size I want to be and stay and I’ll try those on to see how I’m doing.

How often do you weigh yourself?  Do you let yourself get obsessed?  Do you use your pants or a scale to let you know when it’s time to cut back?

I have been complaining about this for years…ever since I learned about fitness, nutrition and health and discovered that all my years of dieting through high school and college were to get “skinny” which was both destructive to being lean and also bad for my overall health…well, and just STUPID!  My goal now is to build muscle and to lower my body fat and get LEAN!    Keep in mind that your “skinny” friends may not have to work out or eat right but they may not be in the best health. I have never “hated” my friends who don’t have to eat right or work out….to each his own, but the older I get the more my hard work in the gym and hand-to-mouth control is more for health and not for looks (hence, my current dilemma and crisis with my upcoming competition). I am not as concerned about my weight as I am my overall health and how long I will live and how good I’ll feel living it!!!

This is a great video…showing the problem with “skinny fat.”  It only talks about BMI and body fat. I think they’re missing a key component. We know that staying lean is healthy in general, for overall health. There have been many studies that show that lowering your calories or living on a calorie-restrictive diet actually prolongs life, BUT there is a point where unhealthy dieting can cut into your muscle mass to the point of being dangerous also….

So, are you skinny fat? Or are you lean? Do you strength train AND do cardio during your weeks?   Do you eat healthy?  “FOOD” for thought!

]]> http://fitoriblog.com/are-you-skinny-fat/feed/ 1 http://fitoriblog.com/the-truth-about-online-anorexia-bbc/?utm_source=rss&utm_medium=rss&utm_campaign=the-truth-about-online-anorexia-bbc http://fitoriblog.com/the-truth-about-online-anorexia-bbc/#comments Sat, 19 Dec 2009 20:13:00 +0000 tori http://fitori.info/?p=170 Just thought I’d briefly share this documentary that is very interesting. I’ve been aware of these pro-ana websites for years….about a decade. The documentary calls these sites “new” but they are not new at all. When I was suffering from my eating disorder, I visited some of these sick pro-ana sites for inspiration. I understand that anorexia isn’t just about food and exercise, or about a low body image. There is MUCH more to it! But, I feel and hope that by giving kids the tools they need to eat healthy and exercise appropriately in order to achieve or maintain a normal body weight and stay healthy, we can give kids some control over their weight the HEALTHY AND FIT way and maybe save some [...]]]>

Just thought I’d briefly share this documentary that is very interesting. I’ve been aware of these pro-ana websites for years….about a decade. The documentary calls these sites “new” but they are not new at all.

When I was suffering from my eating disorder, I visited some of these sick pro-ana sites for inspiration.

I understand that anorexia isn’t just about food and exercise, or about a low body image. There is MUCH more to it!

But, I feel and hope that by giving kids the tools they need to eat healthy and exercise appropriately in order to achieve or maintain a normal body weight and stay healthy, we can give kids some control over their weight the HEALTHY AND FIT way and maybe save some kids from this path.

I think (and again hope) that if I had the tools back then my story might have been different, but I do not know!

I have done a great deal of research on eating disorders and a LOT of my research has led to the mothers of these girls (and boys) and their commentary being a HUGE factor in their childrens’ anorexia!!! So, moms, be careful what you say around your children about yourselves and to your children about them and their weight.

Long story short, I want to bring these sites to the attention of my parent friends so they can be sure their teenagers (girls and boys) are not looking at these sites! Comments welcomed!!!! I’d love to hear what you all have to say!!!

I thought I would introduce you all to Heather Frey and Smashfit if you are not already familiar. You can add her and her Smashfit group on Facebook. The reason I suggest this is that she sends GREAT Facebook messages. They are not about training and that if you do 25 crunches a day you’ll have abs of steel by June….instead they are mental and pscyhological messages about how to stay focused and keep on the right track, which is what we all need now and then, right?

http://www.smashfit.com/article.php?aid=7

She also has a new shirt that she’s selling once you’re fan of yours like I am….

Thanks, Heather for being an inspiration!

P.S. I tried to link you to her Facebook pages if you click on the links on my first sentence but I’m not sure if that worked!!! Also, check her out on Twitter!

I’m writing a paper for my masters class on Female Bodybuilding and Eating Disorders. What do you all think? Is there a link? Do all of us have some sort of disordered eating in our past? Or do some just have some disordered thinking – self-image issues that are tied into self-worth? Or are we all just Type-A perfectionists who except nothing but the best out of ourselves. Or, is there an issue w/ weakness and a fear of weakness? Do we all want to build muscle to be stronger, on the inside and out.